All I’ve Forgotten This Thanksgiving

This Thanksgiving, I’m thanking the Lord for all I can’t remember. 

I’m thanking him for each giggle of my child that’s slipped my memory. For each lego creation that paraded past my eyes only to be replaced in my mind by shopping lists. I’m thanking him for the reading victories, the knock-knock jokes, and the hundreds of hours of imaginative play that filled the year that I can’t fully remember. 

I’m thanking him for the tiny little hugs when I needed them and the forgotten dreams that filled my child’s sleep the night before. For the countless stories we’ve entered into together on the couch that remain a murky haze in my memory. I’m thanking him for the growth I’ve forgotten to notice amidst the daily life that pushes my eyes constantly ahead.  

This Thanksgiving, I’m thanking the Lord for all that I’ve forgotten. For each moment my cheeks burned from laughing with a friend over topics I can’t recall. I’m thanking him for a thousand forgotten embraces from my husband that made me sure of his love. I’m thanking him for all the words I consumed from fiction to theology that seem to have disappeared with each passing book. 

This Thanksgiving I’m thanking the Lord for the forgotten hours and minutes that he held me. For each time I breathed out, “I can’t do this” and he held my hand and carried me through instead. I’m thanking him for the verses, the words, and the songs I can’t remember that he used to minister to me in my deepest moments of need.

I’m thanking the Lord for all that I’ve forgotten. Because, though these moments remain inaccessible, their reality remains true. They happened, and they changed me. God used each forgotten moment of this year to slowly shape me. I saw the Lord’s goodness, his kindness, his joy, his love, his faithfulness, and his comfort with each forgotten moment. Maybe you have too.